You were like an unstable electron,
looking for a proton,
any proton.
And that's why you were so wrong.
Bouncing around the universe,
unversed, yet traversed,
you thought tou knew it all,
you just didn't get it doll.
You tried to hit it wrong,
and fouled off,
each swing a foul ball,
you got it all out,
and ended up a foul mouth,
you flew way south,
and lost my respect.
Now your bet,
is I'll still be at the plate.
Ready to take another swing,
But the truth is another thing,
I'm not even on deck.
This was Toulouse,
So now I gotta Trec.
and now your cryin,
sayin your goin through heck,
baby, wait a sec.
Yeah, you wagered a bad bet.
So I got it figured out,
I know what your all about.
Power player sayin what you want,
and then you pout.
We know what you're about,
about me?
Let me get it all out.
I'm not about to get up and give you my time.
I keep on smiling because I know you know I'm lyin,
I won't be back around to see you,
I don't need a sign,
I'm walking out because my hind-,
sight is 20/20, back then I was blind.
So baby take your time.
Pledge your promises,
like rhombuses,
their awekwardly shaped.
Over frivolence their draped,
baby my ears you've taped.
But while I've got my sanity,
I passionatly say,
baby go away,
come back another day.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
BeLeave
BeLeave, and just leave it behind. Talking with non-member friends the hardest thing that is going on in their conversion is believing that they will be like a member. Somehow in their head they got this screwy idea that members are saints or something..... DOH! I mean perfect or something. No member who had lived their whole live preparing for a temple marriage will marry me when my life seems to have been a life lived so wrong. How can I date a member, I don't want to explain to them my shortcomings but I also don't want to leave them in the dark as to who I am? Doubtful, unconfident, and hurt is how we feel when we don't understand how truly beautiful the atonement is. When someone accepts the atonement and the forgiveness therein they are completly forgiven. Their sins are forgotten. Their hearts are mending and they are allowed, no, commanded by God to forgive themselves. Then they MUST forgive others. Why is it that we still dabble in doubt? 2 scriptures
Prov. 3: 26 For the Lord shall be thy confidence, and shall keep thy foot from being taken.
Prov. 25: 19 Confidence in an unfaithful man in time of trouble is like a broken tooth, and a foot out of joint
Both scriptures refer to the foot. This is what we have to stand on. With the Lord as our confidence we can procede steadily knowing that He has forgiven us of our sins. Without repentance and forgiveness we are as unsteady as a man with a foot out of joint. Nothing to stand on, our belief shaken and our confidence as ashes in the wind.
Forget the fools unwilling to forgive. FORGET THEM. I wish that those who have stepped outside the church and those wanted to step in will do so with confidence that those who have accepted the atonement will also accept the responsibility of "taking upon us the name of Christ" and forgiving other. Especially when they didn't know the gospel before those mistakes were made. If you have overcome so much to get to where you are, and someone dismisses you because when you were 13 you went to football games instead of church and drank before you were baptised your freshman year of college, forget them.
The key, in my mind, is repenting and recieving that confidence, and if they don't repent and recieve that, well, then don't stoop to their level.
I mean, I have lived my whole life being a Peter Priesthood and hanging out with Molly Mormons. I have never drank, I am still a virgin, and I went on a mission. If I wasn't raised a member, I can't say that any of those would be true, so why would I excpect it of others?
Ok, gotta get back to work, I just had to get that out of me. Get it out of my head
Prov. 3: 26 For the Lord shall be thy confidence, and shall keep thy foot from being taken.
Prov. 25: 19 Confidence in an unfaithful man in time of trouble is like a broken tooth, and a foot out of joint
Both scriptures refer to the foot. This is what we have to stand on. With the Lord as our confidence we can procede steadily knowing that He has forgiven us of our sins. Without repentance and forgiveness we are as unsteady as a man with a foot out of joint. Nothing to stand on, our belief shaken and our confidence as ashes in the wind.
Forget the fools unwilling to forgive. FORGET THEM. I wish that those who have stepped outside the church and those wanted to step in will do so with confidence that those who have accepted the atonement will also accept the responsibility of "taking upon us the name of Christ" and forgiving other. Especially when they didn't know the gospel before those mistakes were made. If you have overcome so much to get to where you are, and someone dismisses you because when you were 13 you went to football games instead of church and drank before you were baptised your freshman year of college, forget them.
The key, in my mind, is repenting and recieving that confidence, and if they don't repent and recieve that, well, then don't stoop to their level.
I mean, I have lived my whole life being a Peter Priesthood and hanging out with Molly Mormons. I have never drank, I am still a virgin, and I went on a mission. If I wasn't raised a member, I can't say that any of those would be true, so why would I excpect it of others?
Ok, gotta get back to work, I just had to get that out of me. Get it out of my head
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Ben is married
Ben is married.
Let me just let that have its own line. I think today I finally hit me. It is crazy but Sterling and I are the last amigos. Single and happy. We high fived each other each time we saw some kid screaming or something happening that made us happy to be single. Of course the wedding was awesome. Ben and Brittany looked so happy, and a little stressed. The decorations were amazing as well.
Ben is married.
Meanwhile my dates have consisted of cops ruining the view and making us put out hands on the car, rattlesnakes stopping hikes, park rangers locking up the car, and brothers and sisters watching movies with us. Maybe one of these days I will actually do something but I doubt it. While I hang on to my BAVL status (Born Again Virgin Lips) I increasingly realize I have no moves.
Ben is married
I have no moves
Things aren't looking good
Meanwhile I think I am catching up to life since the car wreck. I was ordered by the MD to totally abandon sports for the last almost month. It has been bad, I finally played soccer last week and scored in 2 minutes, puked in 6. So I was a victorious loser. I am not yet caught up in work but I am no longer behind in school. I joined the xTax team and am hoping to actually win from ASU. We're going to go buy suits and work hard so that may take all my extra time for the next month. I think maybe a national tax championship will replace my so-so grades this semester. I also want to win for the money and the lavish trip to Washington D.C., but who can blame me..... seriously.
This trip has also reminded me how much I love my family and am so thankful for their example. It has been so fun hanging out and playing with my nieces and nephews. Mos definatly the best part of the trip. It was funny all the single ladies at the reception were all over me, grabbing me by the hand and taking me to the dance floor. The only thing was is that all of the single ladies at the receptions were my nieces. Sarah learned how to do a spin and Sariah learned how to go behind my back switch hands and spin. Both demanded two dances so it was pretty tough, lol. Sarah is two so she would go back forward and then spin, I was really impressed. She is one of those girl who loves to imitate.
Ben is married,
and I am glad.
Let me just let that have its own line. I think today I finally hit me. It is crazy but Sterling and I are the last amigos. Single and happy. We high fived each other each time we saw some kid screaming or something happening that made us happy to be single. Of course the wedding was awesome. Ben and Brittany looked so happy, and a little stressed. The decorations were amazing as well.
Ben is married.
Meanwhile my dates have consisted of cops ruining the view and making us put out hands on the car, rattlesnakes stopping hikes, park rangers locking up the car, and brothers and sisters watching movies with us. Maybe one of these days I will actually do something but I doubt it. While I hang on to my BAVL status (Born Again Virgin Lips) I increasingly realize I have no moves.
Ben is married
I have no moves
Things aren't looking good
Meanwhile I think I am catching up to life since the car wreck. I was ordered by the MD to totally abandon sports for the last almost month. It has been bad, I finally played soccer last week and scored in 2 minutes, puked in 6. So I was a victorious loser. I am not yet caught up in work but I am no longer behind in school. I joined the xTax team and am hoping to actually win from ASU. We're going to go buy suits and work hard so that may take all my extra time for the next month. I think maybe a national tax championship will replace my so-so grades this semester. I also want to win for the money and the lavish trip to Washington D.C., but who can blame me..... seriously.
This trip has also reminded me how much I love my family and am so thankful for their example. It has been so fun hanging out and playing with my nieces and nephews. Mos definatly the best part of the trip. It was funny all the single ladies at the reception were all over me, grabbing me by the hand and taking me to the dance floor. The only thing was is that all of the single ladies at the receptions were my nieces. Sarah learned how to do a spin and Sariah learned how to go behind my back switch hands and spin. Both demanded two dances so it was pretty tough, lol. Sarah is two so she would go back forward and then spin, I was really impressed. She is one of those girl who loves to imitate.
Ben is married,
and I am glad.
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